To put it mildly, the last few weeks have been kind of tough. The Terrible Twos are definitely upon us. And before you (Momma) get defensive about the two-year-olds in your life, let me say, I love my two-year-old passionately; two is adorable, hilarious, and exciting, but it is also kicking my tail! I fall in bed mentally, emotionally, and physically exhausted every night, and every morning I feel about the same. Perhaps everything seems a little worse right now because my free, always-available babysitter (my momma) left town for nearly two weeks, but nonetheless two is extremely challenging.

And I have to say that I’ve been pretty disappointed with myself lately. No one likes to see themselves yelling at their two-year-old, and every night I lay in bed with that one major meltdown of the day still weighing heavy on my heart. And I feel embarrassed. I hate for God to see that; I always want to show God my best, and I hate for Him to realize that I am a yeller, that I can, on occasion, lose my temper with a two-year-old child … my two-year-old child … the one He gave me to love and protect.

It’s easy to want to blame the circumstances. “Well, my child is particularly difficult … It’s not really my fault; the situation was unfair … If he weren’t so heavy, so hard to carry, so difficult to manage … If I weren’t so tired … If he would just hold still …” But I’m reminded of an analogy C.S. Lewis once used. If you go in the cellar in the dark and flip the light on, you may see all of the rats and bugs scurrying away. You can’t blame the light and say, “Well, if there had been more warning, there wouldn’t have been any rats … If I hadn’t switched on the light so quickly …” The truth is that the rats were scurrying away because they were in the cellar, not because the light was switched on. And the truth is, that yes, I can behave better in easier circumstances, but the reason I lose my temper is not because Caleb has misbehaved, but because I already have that sin in my heart. Who I am in the most trying circumstances, is, perhaps, who I really am. It’s not about the yelling or the anger and frustration, it’s about the ugliness that is and has always been in my heart.

I had breakfast with my dad this week, and something he said (I can’t remember it exactly, I had a toddler crawling on me at the time) eventually led me to this thought: God is not surprised by my sin; it never shocks Him. He, of course, already knew it was there, and perhaps, just perhaps, He allows me to lose it in these situations so that I can see what He has seen all along. And no, of course He doesn’t like my sin; He wants to get rid of it. But I have to recognize it for what it is before He can heal me. I have to see the ugly, dirtiness of my heart before He can clean it. I’ve prayed many times from Psalm 139, “Search me, O God, and know my heart!” I guess I wasn’t really prepared for what that would look like.

But I have been so comforted by the birth of Christ this Christmas because it is such a beautiful picture of what God is willing to do for us. You see, God is not scared of dirtiness and ugliness. He embraces it. When Jesus, God Himself, God With Us, was born, He didn’t choose to be born in a beautiful hotel suite or even a modern, sterile hospital, He chose a dirty, ugly stable. A stable with cow manure and mud, a stable that was cold and dark . . . just like my heart. But Jesus moved in there, and the beautiful thing about Jesus is that when He dwells in the ugliest, dirtiest of places, He makes them holy. He shines His overpowering grace and truth on the dark places, and suddenly they are not dirty or ugly anymore, they are beautiful. He can turn a dirty, ugly stable into a Holy Temple where worshipers gather, and He can turn my dirty, ugly heart into a dwelling place for the King of Kings.

Last night I was searching my Bible, needing something more than coffee to sustain me, and I found this verse in Philippians, already underlined and starred: “He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ” (Philippians 1:6). What a great relief that God is the one doing a good work in me, not me fixing myself, and it is a work which He intends to complete. Which reminds me of one of my favorite verses, “I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh” (Ezekiel 36:26).

And perhaps that is one of the greatest Christmas presents of all … my heart that God is continually renewing and softening and the work in me that He will complete at the day of Christ. Glory to God in the Highest and Merry Christmas!

A couple of months ago, a friend of mine, Zach Cheatham, and I decided to start a web design business together. I’ve always had a passion for web development, and Zach has an amazing talent for graphic design. I feel that our unique gifts will enable us to provide a broad range of services to our clients.

Our main goal is to enable churches and small businesses to have engaging websites that are easy to maintain and update. In working with churches, my experience has shown me that most churches don’t have a staff member who knows how to maintain and update a complex website, which is why I feel a company like Lamplight Media is needed to help fill this void.

Most people visit a church’s website long before ever stepping foot in their building. Although there are many high quality church websites today, the majority of church websites aren’t very inviting. Which is why I believe that churches need to view their website as an outreach tool, instead of just an informational tool. I hope that our work is able to help draw people to churches and consequently to Christ.

Our company, Lamplight Media, just launched our newly designed website today. I’m very excited about this new venture and pray that God will give us success as we work hard to develop a great product for our clients.

Please feel free to share our information with any churches or business that are looking to build or update a website. Thanks!

» Check out our new site

For those of you who don’t know Mary Beth, she’s an avid reader. Over the past year and a half, she’s constantly been reading books that she had to read, either for grad-school or in preparing for teaching. Now, she’s really excited to be able to read anything she wants. So, for all of you relatives and friends that don’t know what to get her for Christmas, look no further than Barnes & Noble…

Speaking of Christmas…I’m starting to get really excited! The office is starting to get a little quieter as everyone begins to take the rest of their vacation for the year. I can almost hear the Christmas clock ticking as we count down the last 10 days before presents, family, food, and fun. My wife and I are heading up to Gravette, AR in a week to spend a few days with my mom’s side of the family. It’s always fun to go see my grandparents, cousins, aunts, and uncles out in the country. I’m sure there will be plenty of four-wheelin’ and dirt bike ridin’ to go around.

Drop me a note and let me know what you’re planning to do for Christmas…

The new Grace Chapel church of Christ website has finally gone live! This marks the end of a lot of hard work and many hours spent tweaking the site to get it just right.

Of all the sites I’ve developed, I’m most proud of this one. I really feel like my design and programming skills were best utilized on this project.

We did run into a few problems with our first hosting choice, ReadySetConnect. We had originally planned to go live on Friday, but due to a networking mix-up courtesy of ReadySetConnect, our site did not display once we transferred the domain name over. So, I spent all weekend trying to get in touch with someone from their support staff, with no success. They, without a doubt, have the WORST technical support I’ve ever seen. As of this post, I still have not heard back from them since Friday. So, we switched hosting companies and everything worked like a charm!

If you’re looking for a website hosting company, I would steer clear of ReadySetConnect…

Well, I had a great friend and colleague leave to pursue another job on Friday. He’s going to a company called ABC Financial.

He’s really taught me a lot over the past year, and it’s going to be tough without his expertise to fall back on. I’m really going to have to step up and fill in the areas where he worked the most. It will be difficult, but hopefully it will pay off in the end.

By the way, if anyone knows of any good .NET Web Developers with experience in VB.NET and C#, give me a shout in the comments. Thanks!

If you look at the picture above, you will know exactly how it felt to be me during the past two weeks. I just returned from a two week training boot camp to receive my Microsoft Certification. It was incredibly difficult! We covered about 6 months of material in a two week span. I did end up receiving my MCAD certification, but missed my MCSD by one exam! So, I will have to wait two weeks until I can give it another shot.

Overall, it was a pretty stressful trip, but a co-worker and I did get a chance to go to Downtown Disney on our only free night. I had been there before, so it was pretty cool to go again.

Being away from home for two weeks was pretty rough. It made me realize how much I am blessed, and how much I have to be thankful for. If you feel blessed this year, consider giving back to others who need help. Happy Thanksgiving!!

Orlando Pictures:
» A Volvo Made of Legos
» A Volvo Made of Legos(2)
» Nessie Made of Legos
» Planet Hollywood in Downtown Disney
» Tropical Fish at Rainforest Cafe
» A Delicious Meal
» Some GOP HQ by our Laundromat
» GOP HQ(2)
» GOP HQ(3)
» Our Instructor with his Birthday Cake

Well, I leave for Orlando on Sunday and I won’t be back until the 21st. That’s a very long time to be away from home. I’m going to be there for a two week Microsoft Certification course in .NET development. I’m training to be a Microsoft Certified Solution Developer (MCSD). This will be a very beneficial step for my career path, but it will also be a big sacrifice to be away from my wife for that long.

I was excited when I first heard that the training is in Orlando, but then, after looking at the training schedule, I realized that we only get one day off for the entire two weeks!! So, it’s going to be a long haul, but I feel ready. If you know of any good places to eat or play in Orlando, post a comment for me.

Stay tuned for some pictures…

So, over all, not the best bowling performance, but it was very fun! Enjoy the pictures!

Just relaxing between frames

Nice form!

Me after throwing a granny shot

Our bowling team, The Pinheads!

I really enjoy working for a boss who understands the need for a break every once in a while. It really makes everyone else work harder. I’ll let ya know how it goes!

» Millennium Bowl