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  • August20th

    Ethiopia Day Two

    Author: Mary Beth | Posted in: Adoption, Travel

    Friday, July 24th finally came; meeting day, the day I had been dreaming about and imagining for a year was finally a reality. We met the rest of our travel group in the lobby of the hotel. It was fun to meet friends in person that I had been chatting with online for several months. We were all antsy to get next door and meet our kids. First we had an orientation meeting with some of the Holt staff. Again, we were blown away by the kindness, grace, and beauty of the Ethiopian people. The Holt staff is so warm and friendly, we immediately felt comfortable with them.

    After a brief meeting, we were given our name tags and taken next door. We were told that before we met our kids, they wanted to give us a tour of the facility.
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    The Holt Care Center is so beautiful and clean. Outside of being with their own loving family, I can’t imagine a better place for these kids to be.
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    They took us into the rooms where the children sleep and play. They have the kids divided into different age groups, and there are nannies assigned to each group.
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    We saw a few children as we toured the center, but I knew that we hadn’t visited Josiah’s room yet. As none of us had yet seen our kids, we felt sure that they were keeping them in another room until it was time to meet. After viewing the first and second floor, they took us up to the third floor where there were a couple more baby rooms.

    There were quite a few of us, fifteen traveling plus the staff that was giving the tour. Somehow as we walked up to the third floor, I got in the back of the group. As the group crowded into the last nursery, I could hear them ooh-ing and ahh-ing. It seems one family had seen their baby. I couldn’t see into the room, but I listened as the new parents greeted their baby. Then the director asked if anyone else was adopting a baby. “Mary Beth and Casey,” someone answered. “Who is your baby?” the director asked me. “Marefu.” “Ah, Marefu is in here,” she invited me in. “Can you find him?” she asked.

    What??? Pick out my baby from a group of eight or nine, in front of all of these people?!! Didn’t she know that we had only gotten a couple decent pictures of him, and who knows when they were taken or how old he was then? Suddenly everyone moved out of the way to let me in. There were cribs lining the walls of the small room. A few babies played on the floor, but they weren’t mine. I began to feel panicked. What if I got it wrong? What if I picked out the wrong baby in front of everyone? I noticed there were name tags on each bed. I started looking for “Marefu.” “Don’t look at the name tags” the director called. What? He may be in a bed with a different name? To make it even worse, Ethiopians have no qualms about putting boys in pink, and all the children are so pretty that is often very hard to tell if they are boys or girls.

    I cheated. I looked at the name tags. When I found him, he wasn’t at all what I was looking for, but I could tell that he was our little Marefu. Here’s what I was looking for: 2Marefu Sumamo 1 (Medium)

    Here’s what I found:
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    There he was, lying in his little crib. He seemed happy and content, if not a little surprised to suddenly see this white face staring down at him. I picked him up. They had him dressed in a huge fleece jacket. I felt like I was hugging someone in a parka, like I couldn’t really get to him. Soon Casey was at my side, taking pictures and stroking his head.
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    To be honest, the whole thing was so surreal. I don’t know how long we stood there looking at him. The rest of the day is a blur to me. I know that we took turns holding him for a while, and that at one point a nanny brought me some cereal to feed him. He seemed happy with us, and barely cried the entire morning. 2IMG_5672

    At lunch time, we left him to return to our hotel. We ate lunch at the hotel and had another meeting with staff about our upcoming embassy appointment. Later that afternoon we were able to return to the care center to see our kids. This time we walked around the center with him some. It was fun to see the other families and meet their kids.
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    The whole day seemed to fly by. My memory of it is somewhat blurry, like memories of our wedding day, or the day Caleb was born. I know what I did, and I remember the events of the day, but the reality of what was happening and the emotions that follow were so overwhelming it was almost numbing.

    When I look back on this whole adoption process, this day, meeting day, will always be the day we jumped off the cliff. I thought boarding the plane was jumping off, but that was still part of the climb, a long, hard, steady climb. This day, the day Casey and I held him and looked into his eyes for the first time, will always be the day that we held our breath and jumped.

  • August13th

    Ethiopia Day One

    Author: Mary Beth | Posted in: Adoption, Travel

    I’m going to try to write about each of the eight amazing days that we spent in Ethiopia. We landed in Addis Ababa on the morning of Thursday, July 23. After working our way through the Visa line (much shorter than we expected) and customs, and retrieving all six of our bags, we were met in the terminal by one of Holt’s drivers, Dawit. What a kind and friendly face to be met by at such an anxious moment. Dawit was so warm and hospitable, exactly the kind of person you would like to meet in a foreign country. In our experience, we found that most Ethiopians are warm and friendly; it didn’t take long for us to fall in love with these beautiful people.

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    He drove us from the airport to the Union Hotel. Casey and I were nearly silent the whole way; there was so much to see and take in. One of the first things that struck me about Ethiopia was the beautiful landscape. No one had told me what a beautiful country Ethiopia is. Green mountains and rolling hills are everywhere.

    We were also overwhelmed by the number of people. Addis is a city of over 3.5 million. Everywhere you look there are people, and donkeys, and goats that are spray painted pink (we never figured out why), and cars, and buses, and shops. All this congestion and absolutely no stoplights or stop signs. There is lots of honking and waving, but we never saw anyone get mad or lose their temper. Somehow we always ended up where we were supposed to be, but there were a few times I had to close my eyes as we passed uncomfortably close to a bus or crowd of people. Their buses are about the size of a fifteen-passenger van, but they can crowd an amazing number of people into them. Thankfully we never had to experience that.

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    Our hotel was right next door to the Holt Care Center where Josiah had lived for the last several months. It was hard to drive by the building knowing that he was in there but we couldn’t see him for another day.
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    We were very pleased with our hotel room; it was big and comfortable, very clean. We could definitely recommend the Union Hotel to anyone who is staying in Addis. Usually the electricity was out during the day, but I think that’s pretty normal for Ethiopia. Casey and I got a little chuckle out of the toilet paper instructions that were over the toilet. What are the quotation marks for?
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    After catching up on our sleep for the next few hours, we visited Kebetsehay Children’s Home, which is a government orphanage in Addis for children birth through 13 years old. We went to visit our sponsor child, Bete, but when we got there we found out that Bete had recently been adopted by a German family. Hooray for Bete! We were sad that we didn’t get to meet her, but so, so happy to hear that she now has a family. We still had a great time playing with the kids. We brought a huge duffel bag of donations for the orphanage, medicine, school supplies, soccer balls, etc. The kids were naturally very excited about the candy, bracelets, and stickers we passed out.
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    Casey made friends with a couple of the older boys, while I had a little girl following me around most of the afternoon. I probably spent the most time in the baby room. The little babies were so beautiful. It was evident that the nannies at Kebetsehay love the children very much and were working very hard to care for them, but they are still in great need. The babies lying in cribs will break your heart. There was one little baby who was crying when I walked by. I tried to comfort her and offered my finger for her to hold. She held on tightly and quieted a little, but every time I tried to walk away she would start crying again. It was so hard to finally pull away after standing by her crib for about thirty minutes. Sweet, sweet, girl. I pray that God is providing for her every need right now, and that she will have a family some day soon.

    As we were starting to say our goodbyes to all the sweet kids, it began to rain, big, splattering drops. During the rainy season in Ethiopia, big thunderstorms blow in and out with little warning. As we drove back through the Mercato, Africa’s largest market, on our way back to our hotel, we watched as water filled the muddy streets. Some people huddled under shop awnings, and some just walked through the rain.

    We were glad to have a quiet night, since we had so much to think about from our day at Kebetsehay. During our dinner at the Union, we were able to visit with one of the other Holt families, Jeff and Bethany, along with Bethany’s aunt Robin. Most of the families wouldn’t arrive until later, but it was nice to have the chance to get to know Jeff and Bethany and hear about the several days that they spent at a children’s home in Hosanna, Ethiopia earlier that week. Jeff and Bethany have a son from Ethiopia who is almost exactly the same age as Caleb, and they were in Ethiopia again to adopt their daughter.

    Needless to say, Day One in Ethiopia was a very blessed and full day. We went to bed exhausted but ready to meet our boy in the morning!

  • August11th

    Still here . . .

    Author: Mary Beth | Posted in: Adoption, Home Life & Family

    smallIMG_5909We’re still here, and doing great! We are so blessed to have little Josiah home with us; he is a joy to everyone who meets him. Of course, there’s still plenty of adjusting going on. I am learning that keeping everyone clothed, fed, and happy is a full-time job (hence no blogging recently), but I am so thankful to be blessed with this job.

    Caleb is still not sure what to think about his baby brother. I think he misses having Momma and Daddy to himself. He hinted at his slight dissatisfaction with the new situation when he casually mentioned to me, “If baby Josiah keeps fussing, you’re going to have to take him back to ‘Epeeopia.’” Of course I immediately explained that Josiah is here to stay, to be in our family forever and ever, just like Caleb. I don’t think it sunk in because later that afternoon he tried again with, “Maybe tomorrow we can take baby brother back to Africa??” I can’t say I didn’t laugh. It was such an honest emotion. If I had known you could send baby brothers to Africa, I’m sure I would have tried it myself.

    Overall, we are doing very, very well. I’ve been really surprised at how well Josiah seems to have adjusted to our family. We’ve been amazed by his developmental gains over the last two weeks. It seems he’s made two months of progress in only a few weeks.

    We will be blogging about Ethiopia in the near future. We had an amazing trip, and I can’t wait to tell you about it. We will also be posting pictures; I know everyone is anxious to see them. In the mean time, our pictures from Rome are posted in the photos section of the blog. We had a great three days in Rome, but I won’t bore you with the details, as I’m sure you’ve heard of Rome before.

  • August2nd

    Home, Sweet Home

    Author: Mary Beth | Posted in: Adoption, Home Life & Family

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    Yes, we’re home with our beautiful baby boy. Our trip was amazing, and it is wonderful being home with both of our boys. There’s more to come . . . we promise. It just may take a while.

  • July18th

    Ready or Not?

    Author: Mary Beth | Posted in: Adoption, Spiritual

    We’re ready. The bags are packed. We’re leaving at the crack of dawn, and we’re about to take the greatest leap of faith we’ve ever taken.

    We’re greatly anticipating His faithfulness and blessings as we step out on our biggest adventure yet.

    “O LORD, you are my God; I will exalt you; I will praise your name, for you have done wonderful things, plans formed of old, faithful and sure.”
    ~Isaiah 25:1

  • July5th

    A Walking Billboard

    Author: Mary Beth | Posted in: Adoption, Home Life & Family

    adoption_billboardThe countdown has officially started; in a little less than two weeks, Casey and I will be boarding a plane, beginning the last leg of our journey to bring our son home. As you can imagine, we are so excited. We can’t believe that this moment, that we’ve been waiting for and dreaming of for a year, is only days away.

    As I fold Caleb’s baby clothes and pack them in a suitcase, reality is beginning to settle in. This isn’t make-believe any more. This time next month we will be home with our little guy; we will be a family of four. And while there is all the thrill and excitement of bringing home a new baby, there is also a bit of anxiety. We knew this would be an adventure when we signed up. And now that it’s time to pack our bags, we feel the need to take a deep breath and prepare ourselves, as much as possible, for the challenges that we will face as adoptive parents.

    And one of the challenges we’ve worried about, talked about, and prayed about is the attention and commentary that we will draw as a biracial family. As Heather writes so descriptively on her blog, “When we said, ‘Yes…we will parent an African American child,’ we also signed up to be a walking billboard for adoption and race issues.” Casey and I know this is going to be a part of our lives; we expect it, and it is our greatest desire to handle all comments and questions graciously, in a way that honors God.

    However, while we expect crazy comments and questions from strangers at Target, we hope and pray that our family and friends will be a safe haven for us, that they will work with us to protect Josiah from insensitive comments or inappropriate questions.

    Discussing adoption can be tricky. Casey and I have both found ourselves tripping over the appropriate words from time to time, and we know that the majority of inappropriate comments come from a lack of experience or understanding about adoption.

    So we would like to take this opportunity to ask those of you who are and will be a significant part of our lives and Josiah’s life to take a few moments to think and pray about the following list of suggestions. Will you help us protect Josiah and other adopted children from rude or insensitive comments?

    1) Please don’t say things like, “Caleb is theirs . . . and then they adopted Josiah.” They are both ours. We truly believe that from the beginning God has intended Caleb and Josiah, and any other children we may be blessed with in the future, to be in our family. We believe that Josiah has always been a Picker, even though he was conceived in Africa and carried by his birth mother. It takes very little imagination to understand the damage that kind of phrasing can have on a child.

    2) Please be sensitive about the kind of adoption questions you ask us in front of Josiah. If you are interested in adoption, we will always be glad to talk to you about it, but we would like for our son to be a normal kid as much as possible and not have to constantly deal with the topic of his adoption.

    3) Some of you close to us may know about Josiah’s early situation. Please be very careful with this information. It is something that we will not discuss with people outside of our close family and friends, and it is something that you should never discuss with Josiah. Naturally we will be discussing his origins with him often, but that information will be best handled between Josiah and ourselves. Also, please do not share this information with your children. It is enough to say that Josiah needed a mommy and daddy, and we needed a little boy. We can all remember foolish things that we said as children, and we would hate for personal facts about Josiah’s early life to be used against him as ammunition by his friends or cousins.

    4) Another comment that we’ve heard a lot is “He [Josiah] sure is a lucky/blessed little boy.” We’ve struggled with this comment because, on the one hand, it is true. He is blessed to have a family, just as we all are. A lot of times this comment seems to come from a desire to compliment us for being great parents or for doing a great thing, and while we certainly appreciate the parenting encouragement, we want to make it abundantly clear that we do no great things . . . it is God who has done great things. We don’t want Josiah to be viewed as a charity case; he is our son. The truth is that we are all charity cases, we were all once orphans, and those of us who have been adopted and received salvation through Christ are abundantly blessed.

    We hope that none of this has been offensive to you, but if it has been challenging we hope that you will take the time to pray about it and discuss it with us. We thought it would be best for us to approach this topic head on, rather than deal with these issues after the fact. We hope to help create a culture of adoption among our family and friends, and identifying appropriate lingo is an important step in that process. If you would like to read more, Heather, whose blog I love, has written an insightful post on the topic.

    We are extremely blessed to be surrounded by so many loving people as we embark on this adventure. Please understand that we will all be learning through this process. We can’t wait to see the ways that God will bless all of us through Josiah.

  • June29th

    Travel!

    Author: Mary Beth | Posted in: Adoption, Travel

    ethiopiaWe finally got our travel dates! We will be meeting our baby boy on July 24th, and hopefully be home with him on July 31st.

    Please continue to pray for us. I’ll be posting more soon.

  • June15th

    Introducing . . .

    Author: Mary Beth | Posted in: Home Life & Family

    smallJacob (90)Probably not who you were expecting, but almost as good. Our precious little nephew, Jacob Allan, was born early this morning to Allan and Lindsay. He was 6lbs. 10oz. He has blue eyes and lots of blonde hair.We are so proud of him and so thankful to welcome this little one into our family. We are excited for Caleb and Josiah to have the blessing of growing up only a couple miles from their cousin and pray that they will have close relationships for the rest of their lives.

    See more pictures . . .

  • June11th

    Caleb Kurtis

    Author: Mary Beth | Posted in: Home Life & Family

    No news on our travel dates yet, but I feel a great peace about it, even though I have been so anxious throughout this process. Has God not proven Himself to me?? He has been so faithful to us; I have to trust that His timing is perfect. I know that we will be with Josiah at the exact moment that He has planned.

    In the meantime, I am trying to enjoy the first special treasure that He gave me: Caleb Kurtis. I know I’m his momma, but I have to say that this kid is special. If you haven’t met him, you are missing out! I’m trying to soak up these last moments, realizing that he will never be an only child again. Of course, he is always going to be our precious son, and we will always be absolutely in love with him, but things are about to change. I know that I will savor memories from these last three years for the rest of my life.

    Here are some pictures of my crazy kid:

    Isn't he adorable?

    Isn’t he adorable?

    Not really into the picture thing.

    Not really in to the picture thing.

    Cool guy.

    Cool guy.

    I refuse to cooperate.

    I refuse to cooperate.

    The squinty face he makes sometimes.

    The squinty face he makes sometimes.

    Just my crazy kid.

    Just my crazy kid.

  • June5th

    Today . . .

    Author: Mary Beth | Posted in: Adoption, Home Life & Family

    flag2Yesterday, there were 5 million orphans in Ethiopia, but TODAY THERE IS ONE LESS!

    We passed court!

    And now Josiah has a mommy, and a daddy, and a big brother, and four grandparents, and six aunts and uncles, and three first-cousins, and seven great-grandparents, and 20 great-aunts and uncles, and more second- and third-cousins than I can count, and hundreds and hundreds of friends waiting to love him! Yesterday he was an orphan, but TODAY HE HAS A FAMILY!

    And yesterday we were a family of three, but today we are a family of FOUR! Yesterday we had one son, and today we have TWO!

    Praise God!! We are so thankful! We are overwhelmed by His goodness and mercy and faithfulness to us! Thank you for your prayers!

    We are still waiting for our travel dates, but we will be leaving in the next few weeks to bring our son home!

    “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you” John 14:18